Day 23. In Bruges. (Bruges)

That's right. I was there. And it was totally awesome. I started out, by eating "paanakoek bruine suika on boter". I may have spelled that completely wrong (in fact, I most assuredly did), but pretty much just say "pancake with brown sugar and butter" in the most ridiculous dutch accent you can muster up, and that's pretty much it.

Do I need to tell you how delicious this is? Yes I do. It was crispy, and buttery, and the brown sugar was super dark and crunchy in the most perfect way. THIS is how one should start their day.







Bruges is beautiful. If I were to be shot, I think this would be an O.K. place for that to happen.

 

 It was cool. We also got boat raided by some swans

Swans can be vicious when it comes to nautical warfare. DON'T underestimate them. 3 people died.

By the way, here is the hotel where Colin Ferrel was in the movie, and where he jumped out the window.

And this is the ridiculously huge clock tower that Brendan Gleeson throws himself from. YES I climbed all 366 steps to the top. Ok, no I didn't. But they wanted me to pay money for it, and if I'm going to pay money for a cardio workout, it's going to be air-conditioned, have water fountains, and there dang well better be some half naked men about. Offering none of these, I politely walked away.

I think maybe the reason not too many people go to museums, is there's not enough variety, or enough subjects that they are interested in. Bruges has come up with a solution. Today, I went to the Friet Museum, which is for the Belgian french fries, and the Chocolate Museum. Both of these were interesting, and fed my mind, and my belly. That is my kind of education!

Me and Cherise, gettin' our potato on

You don't even know how delicious these are. YOU DON'T EVEN KNOW!!! Also, Belgians eat their fries with mayo, which is kind of weird, but I accepted this delicious tradition. I am now a true Belgian.

 

I watched this being born, and took part in it's delicious demise. That's the chocolate cirlcle of life. Also, dear museums, if you would like me to visit more often, please feed me free food.

The evolution of the use of chocolate has been a long journey, but THANK GOODNESS. I mean, I do love chocolate to possibly a mentally unstable degree, but I think I draw the line at my steak. They're like your 2 girlfriends. They're wonderful on their own, but they can never meet.

 

They also had full out Mobil displays of chocolate history, including Cortez, and nobles, and all that junk. That's how you know it's official.

 I of COURSE bought me up some hand made Belgian chocolate, which pretty much lasted- well, it didn't. It didn't last. Chocolate like this just doesn't hang around for long. You take one taste and you have a chocolate blackout, and the next thing you know you wake up naked in a park, shoving chocolate into the mouth of a historical statue. It's ok though, the Belgians understand. It's a cultural thing. What a good people.

WARNING: If you have small children, or a strange abhorrence for human "special place" organs, then today's blog entry ends here. If you're up for some sweet sweet naughtiness, then feel free to scroll down.

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So I was reading that chocolate may be an aphrodisiac, but it's not really a proven fact. as a solution to this, it seems that the Belgians decided to make sure it was an arousing experience, and just straight up made chocolate porn. Here you go!

TA-DAAAAAAAAA! Yeah I know, I kind of hyped it up a lot, but considering all the varieties, I had a good laugh. And everyone loves chocolate boobs, so don't even pretend you're disappointed.